Thursday, May 26, 2016

I'm a runaway

I didn't know you could just run away like that until I was 9 years old and on a psych hold in Madison.

Shannon was about my age. Mouthy, cherub-cheeked, and she had a bowl cut. She scaled the fence and took off running when we were outside for recreation.

Just like that.

It never even occurred to me to do such a thing.

Shnnon caused quite a scene. Lots of yelling and keys jangling and her legs kicking at everyone involved in the commotion. It took three of them to take her down and bring her back.

She was on fire and she could not be contained.

When she came back to the unit she sat in the time-out room and triumphantly sang a little song she made up:

"I'm a runaway! No one can stop me!"

I was jealous of her.

I hadn't been this jealous ever since first grade when Lisa could print her name in cursive.

Shannon sang it over and over again:

"I'm a runaway! No one can stop me!"

"I'm a runaway! No one can stop meeeeee!"

I finally walked over to the door and mumbled "Security stopped you"

Shannon was quiet after that.

Wednesday, May 25, 2016

"I'm Always Chasing Rainbows"

At the end of the rainbow there's happiness
And to find it how often I've tried
But my life is a race
Just a wild goose chase
And my dreams have all been denied
Why have I always been a failure
What can the reason be
I wonder if the world's to blame
I wonder if it could be me

I'm always chasing rainbows, watching clouds drifting by
My schemes are just like all my dreams
Ending in the sky
Some fellows look and find the sunshine
I always look and find the rain
And some fellows make a winning sometime
And I never even make a gain
I'm always chasing rainbows waiting to find the little bluebird in vain